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fic - cake [misc] - the turnip patch
version 2.0
fic - cake [misc]
Title:  Cake
Summary:  Boys-on-sofa fic is hard to name.  Sparked by me telling someone to give me a prompt, and that person saying 'I would never...' (ha, bet you never thought i was gonna do it, eh?)


Duo wiped his hand on his rag before taking the bottle handed to him.  "Do I really look like I need one of these?"

"Couldn't hurt."  Heero shrugged, popping the cap off his own beer.  "That, and these have been sitting in the back of my fridge for a while.  If you don't help me get rid of them, who will?"

Duo reached out to tap the neck of his bottle against Heero's.  "Well, in that case... Cheers."

They stood quietly for a bit, immersed in their thoughts and their beers.  Duo spent some of his time studying the tidy clutter of Heero's garage.  Truth be told, most of it was probably his own clutter, but he just had an apartment, and Heero had a townhouse with underutilized storage space -- at least according to Duo.  The purchase of real estate wasn't really his thing, but friends with real estate wasn't half bad.  And friends that would let him come over to rotate his tires in their garage?  Priceless.

"Man, it's been a long week," Duo sighed.

Heero moved a shoulder in a noncommittal fashion.  "You're lucky you engage in auto maintenance to relax."

"Yeah, otherwise I'd never get some of this stuff done.  I've been needing to find the time to do this for a while now."

"I thought you had plans with Carruthers this weekend?"

Duo snorted.  "Yeah, I did.  They, uh, fell through."

Heero mulled over that for a moment or two.  "I saw you both in the mess hall a couple days ago.  You... didn't engage in your usual banter."

He made an annoyed sound.  "Yeah.  We... Probably not so much anymore."

"Did something happen?"

The mild question earned a less-than-mild response.  "Yeah, she ruined everything is what happened!"  He allowed himself to be irritated for about five seconds before he wiped the frown off his face and puffed out a loud breath to restore his equilibrium.  "I liked her.  She was cool, yanno?  Wicked sense of humor.  Good taste in music.  Knew how to have a good time and all."

"And she ruined...?"

"Everything," Duo repeated sourly.

"'Everything' is quite a lot," Heero observed wryly.

"Yeah, we were going to hang out this weekend, until she kind of made it clear she wanted it to be a date."

Heero was silent for a few seconds.  "Not interested?"

"Not at all!  I mean, no offense to her, 'cuz she's cool, I said that, right?  But just totally not interested in her that way.  She was just like an awesome friend.  And now what?  Now everything's all awkward, right?  Can't really hang out like we used to anymore."

"Is she... making it awkward, or are you?"

"Hey, I was the one who asked if we were still on for the weekend, and she was the one that said we should probably let this one go."

"Maybe she just meant this one, and maybe next time...?"

"She seemed pretty bummed that I turned her down, and that's not just me tooting my own horn there.  Yeah, maybe she'd be willing to hang out again some time on down the line, but I bet it'd probably take a lot of time and effort to put us back in that place."

"You don't think it'd be worth the time and effort?"

"Well, gosh, don't make me sound so heartless.  I just... yanno, it wouldn't be the same.  And, well, okay, maybe I am a little bit heartless, but she wasn't super special in a BFF kind of way."

"Oh."  Heero seemed to perk up a little.  "If she were... that 'special'... you think it'd be okay?  Things would go back to normal?  ...Hypothetically, I mean."

"Hmmm."  Well-accustomed to Heero asking the occasional odd question delving into the complexities of advanced social interaction, Duo gave it the thought he felt Heero deserved.  "Well.... Maybe not 'normal'... Once that kind of bomb is dropped, it doesn't get undropped, yanno?  Plus, man, I dunno, maybe it'd be even more weird if she were a BFF."

Heero frowned.  "But you just said--"

"Yeah, yeah, I know what I just said.  Guy's allowed to reconsider after some thought, isn't he?  No, actually, that's not what I just said.  I said it'd be worth the effort, but I didn't say it couldn't be even more weird.  Like, maybe it'd take even more time and effort.  People don't just get to BFF status overnight.  And if we're really best buds, we're supposed to know some serious shit about each other, right?  I think it'd get weird."

"Weird, how exactly?"

"Well, like second-guessing and stuff.  Like, what did I miss, and was *that* what that was all about?  And then moving forward from the past, well, I gotta assume that it'd have to be a kinda serious thing, yanno?  Like, if it was just a passing crush or something, that card woulda been played a long time ago, long before the whole BFF thing, so it'd have to be kinda serious, don't you think?  And man, that'd kinda suck!  'Cuz you just turned that person down, and that never feels good, and you're the jerk that just made your best bud not feel good."

"I don't think your 'best bud' would think you're a jerk...."

"Yeah, but I think I'd still feel like one.  Or if *that* didn't make me feel like one, then, geez, that serious thing doesn't just go away, right?  It takes a while to get over unrequited shit like that..."  He trailed off contemplatively, sipping at his beer.  "It takes a while, and it's not easy... and I don't think hanging out with the object of your affections is really the best way to do it, unless you really like pouring salt in your wounds.  Which, granted, some of us do seem to enjoy."

Heero raised an eyebrow.

Duo rolled his eyes and settled on looking somewhere else after that was done.  "Not literally."

"Literally or figuratively, Duo, it's still not a very healthy thing to do."

"Yeah, well I can't help it if some of us... Well.  Anyway.  There's nothing I could do to make that go any faster except clear out, I guess."

"What if that made it harder?" Heero asked, brow furrowed.  He shifted uncomfortably when Duo looked at him for clarification.  "I mean... well.... You're this person's best friend, right?  Aren't you supposed to be there for that person?  Isn't that person relying on you to offer your support and sympathy?"

"Well... shit, Heero, a guy's only human, best friend or not.  I can't make things better by will alone.  Maybe you can, since you're you and you have a little bit of a history with that, but me, not so much."  Duo felt a little bit bad when Heero drank from his bottle like he was hiding a grimace.  He knew Heero wasn't a fan of bringing up the extraordinary things he had accomplished, not when it set him apart from the others, but sometimes it just sort of came out.

"Maybe the first step should be for you to show that you're still okay with things.  Pulling back would only make that person feel worse."  Heero started firmly, but continued with less certainty after making eye contact with Duo.  "Don't you think?  The intention is for things to return to normal, isn't it?"

"Well, yeah... but you know, in reality, it's easy to say, but not all that easy to do.  'Normal' was back when you thought you two were just friends.  But now, there's this big pile of stuff you shouldn't do 'cuz that's really not appropriate anymore.  That's gonna make things awkward now and again, no matter what."  Duo scratched at the edge of the label printed on the bottle with one fingernail.

"And you'd be upset because it would all be 'ruined'..."

"I don't mean like upset-pissed.  I wouldn't be pissed off at someone for something like that.  Not their fault I'm so damn charming."  He chuckled a little self-consciously.  "I mean like upset... sad.  Dude's my best bud for a reason or three, after all.  I'd hate to see that ruined."

"You sounded a little 'pissed' about Carruthers," Heero pointed out.

"Yeah, well that was just me being a bitch.  And I said she wasn't a super-special best friend kind of thing, didn't I?  I'm gonna be upset for a little bit, and then -- man, this is gonna make me sound like a douche again -- but honestly?  I'm gonna get over that kinda quick.  She was different, sure, and I like different, but... she wasn't once-in-a-lifetime better-not-mess-this-up different.  It'd take quite a bit for someone to get up to that level.  Well, okay, not that we don't have a whole group of us that's that tight, but it's still a small group, and it's not like I have to worry about you confessing your love for me or something, right?"

"I would never do something like that."

Duo let out a laugh that was almost too loud for the situation.  "Ha, wow, no hesitation or anything.  Didn't know I was that unattractive to you."

"I value your friendship far too much to 'ruin' things like that."  Heero stared at the torque wrench on the box in front of him for a few seconds before breaking his focus with another visit to the bottle.

"Right back at you, buddy."  Duo saluted him with his beer.  "Right back... at... you."  It was as if the hairs rose on the back of his neck, or something equally portentious.  'Right back', indeed.  Literally?  There wasn't a snowball's chance that it could possibly be meant literally, but some long-dormant spark inside of him insisted he at least make a token effort at testing the waters.  His eyes slid over to Heero, to find that the man was still studying his torque wrench.  "But, uh... Well, I totally would, though, if I thought it were reciprocated.  Because that just elevates things to a whole new ballgame."

He held his breath for the few excruciating seconds it took for Heero to blink and slowly turn in his direction.  They locked gazes for a few more seconds before Heero looked away.  "I don't think I would."

"You wouldn't?"  He wondered if his expression showed at all how mildly horrifying he found that answer.

"...Not unless I knew for sure.  And even then..."

Duo stared at him with an intensity that almost became a glare.  "Seriously?  You'd wait for an absolute one-hundred percent chance of success?  When did you become such a weenie, Yuy?  Step up and take a chance, man."

Heero threw a defiant look at him.  "You just said you wouldn't take the chance unless you thought it was reciprocated."

"You just said you wouldn't take the chance EVEN IF you thought it was reciprocated!  If that's not good enough for you, what the hell is?"

"Even if it were, there's still a chance it could all be 'ruined'.  Probably a pretty good chance, all things considered.  Why would I ruin a perfectly good friendship for those kinds of odds?"

"'All things considered'?  You think you'd probably ruin things, 'all things considered'?  When did you get so negative, Yuy?"

"I didn't say I would personally ruin things."

"No, but you're not the kind of person that would place the blame for ruining things at someone else's feet, and you're exactly the kind of person that would take full responsibility for it."

Heero scowled, but only because he didn't have a good defense against the accusation.  "It's not as if I have a lot of experience with this sort of thing.  I'm sure I could stumble upon one of the thousands of ways to end a relationship badly."

"Bah, come on," Duo scoffed.  "Anyone can do that!"

"All the more reason," Heero retorted.

Not an entirely invalid point.  Duo could give him that much, but not much more.  "And look at all those relationships out there that do succeed.  Lots of people doing that, too!"

"Yeah?  Have you?"

Low blow.  Duo dodged.  "Correct me if I'm wrong, but did we just more or less totally admit to liking each other?"

Since Duo's tone hadn't yet modulated into something less aggressive, Heero regarded the question rather warily.  "I think so."

"Then why the hell are we arguing this?"  He took the few steps necessary to eliminate the distance between them and closed in for a kiss.  He stopped just short of Heero's lips, hesitating for just two short seconds to make sure that all systems were go, he was going to do this, he was sure and Heero wasn't pulling away, and then finished what he had started, with far less speed but far more care.  Heero seemed a willing participant, even if he did also seem to be holding something back.  Duo slid an arm around him to keep him in place before letting their lips part.  "There.  One-hundred percent reciprocated.  End of story."

Heero's eyes flicked over Duo's face like he was searching for something.  "I meant... what I said, Duo.  I value your friendship far too much..."

"I meant what you said, too, Heero."  Duo flashed a quick smirk at him.  "See how awesome we are?  You're finishing my sentences before I even start them."

"I'm... not exactly your type," Heero pointed out softly.

"My type?  You mean like all the other people I've dated in the past?  The people I never went more than a couple of months with?  That's great.  That means we have a chance.  You don't want to be like them.  I don't want you to be like them."  He set his neglected beer down on the nearby workbench so he could give Heero a proper squeeze.  "To get back to your question... don't mistake never having been in a proper long-term relationship with being bad at one."

Heero studied his face some more before finally setting his bottle down carefully next to Duo's so he could tentatively return the embrace.  "You must really like rubbing salt in your wounds."

Duo laughed a little more loudly than he'd intended.  "Yeah, okay.  Like I said.  Some of us do seem to enjoy it."


His expression dimmed a little.  "You know, I tried, kinda.  Dunno if you even noticed.  But I tried to put a little distance between us, figured it'd help... Nope, can't say that it did.  Can't say that I even thought it was possible to put that kind of distance between us."

"And you didn't say anything because...?"

"Dude, weren't you listening to my ranting five minutes ago?  I try to practice what I preach."  He snickered.  "Musta given you quite the scare there, huh?"

Heero snorted softly, the puff of breath crossing the short distance between them to tickle Duo's face.  "Not exactly.  You told me exactly what I needed to do to avoid ruining our friendship."

"And you were prepared to do it?"

"You did, didn't you?"

"Yeah, but it'd just be stupid if both of us were doing it.  Which, I guess we were for a while there.  And I don't think I even wanna know how long.  It'd probably just be embarrassing."

"What's embarrassing is Carruthers had more guts than either of us."

"Ouch."  He swayed them back and forth a little bit, mostly because he could, and damn was it satisfying.  "You should have said something earlier."

"Why me?  Why not you?"

"You had a higher chance of success."

Heero visibly puzzled over that one for a few seconds.  "I'm not even sure what that's supposed to mean."

"Think about it.  Me being me, and you being you... There was a higher chance of me liking you, than there was you liking me."

"Everyone likes you, Duo."

"Not like I want them to."  He paused, then shook his head.  "Correction.  Not like I want you to.  And even if you were lured in by my inherent awesomeness...  well... you're you.  No offense, of course, 'cuz I kinda like you."  He paused again, this time for a shy smile.  "I kinda really like you.  But, well... that's not an insignificant hurdle right there."

Heero's brain had agreed a while back that liking Duo was somewhat counter to his nature, but it chose to let it go without too much hassle.  "Maybe.  But I had more to lose."

"What, you saying you're a sucky friend?  You're wrong."

"I'm saying I don't have that many friends to begin with, that I can really afford to lose one."

"Wow.  That's depressing.  Well, from now on, I count as two.  That's the least I can do."

"Now that means I have even more to lose," Heero pointed out dryly.  "You're really vying for my once-in-a-lifetime better-not-mess-this-up person, aren't you?"

"You just said I've got no one to vie against."

"Oh.  Yes, that's true."  He shrugged.  "Guess you're it, then."

"Oh.  Wow, just like that, huh?"

"Did you want there to be more of a fight for it?"

"Nah, this is good."  He grinned, gave Heero a kiss before snuggling in tighter.  "This is good.  Just like this."  They fit together well.  Over Heero's shoulder, he spied his beer.  He hated warm beer.  Before that could happen, he reached out for his bottle and tossed it back.

Heero chuckled.  "You need the beer to make it good, huh?"

"Beer makes lots of stuff better, Heero.  Don't take it personally."  He leaned back for a wink and another quick kiss.  "This is gonna work out great, Heero."

"How do you figure?"

"We were great at not messing up our friendship, right?"

"I thought we were stupid."

"Stupidly great.  So not messing up our relationship should be cake for us, right?"  He tapped a nearby two-by-four twice with his foot.

"There's that patisserie that just opened with that name you thought was funny, right?"

Duo found himself oddly tickled that he remembered.  "Are you suggesting we sit down to some cake after, oh, say dinner?"

"I am."

"For someone who's never really done this before... you're pretty slick at asking a guy out."

"Thank you."

"It's a date, Yuy."

Tags: ,

25 comments or Leave a comment
sharona1x2 From: sharona1x2 Date: December 5th, 2010 12:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
That was lovely. I'm always very interested in stories where they take that leap from friends to romantic partners. It's fun seeing how they go about it, especially when it's this realistic. Plus, combining Heero and Duo with cake (sort of) is pretty much all my favorite things together.

I'd love to archive this, if that's okay with you.
turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 5th, 2010 06:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm glad you like them, since that seems to be mostly what I write in these shorts. ^^ It's admittedly what got me writing in the first place, since I used to see so many fics where the leap from A to B was so sudden and drastic and completely confounding.  I pretty much had to start writing just to reassure myself that they were in fact OTP. ^_^

Please, archive away.  Hopefully you can come up with a better summary than I can. ^o^
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 5th, 2010 05:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
They are like some kind of DNA spiral; always right next to each other, always turning together... ^___^

I am clearly speechless with squee. They are a double spiral, circling opposite each other until they get to the center where they end up together. ^___^

Okay, not much better, but you get the idea. ^____^ Love it!

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 5th, 2010 06:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
As long as there's a creamy sweet center in the middle, we're all good. ^_^
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 5th, 2010 07:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
I am positive that once that spiral gets to the center there is tons of sweet creamy goodness. ^___^

It just occurred to me... Duo is eventually going to have plenty of storage space. ^____^ I mean, more convenient than it already is.

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 6th, 2010 02:12 am (UTC) (Link)
I way overthought the whole garage thing... Like, I can't imagine that Heero would have bought a very large townhouse for just himself, though I can justify 2-bdrm since 1 just isn't really worth the investment.  But then I spent all this time contemplating whether he'd have a two car garage, or a long one-car garage.  The one-car seems more likely based on the townhouses I've seen, but then those are harder to do any work in since they're usually rather narrow, and then either Heero would have had to move his car out, or he'd have had to move it all the way in, but to do that, then there can't be too much miscellaneous stuff in the garage...

*waves magic fic wand*
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 6th, 2010 03:22 am (UTC) (Link)
There are some townhouses near here that have the long end-to-end garage and they look bizarre to me. Even just parking two cars seems like it would be a never-ending nightmare of constant juggling. Yuck. O.o

The magic fic wand says Heero's townhouse is very roomy and has a double side-by-side garage that he picked out with Duo's do-it-yourself tendencies in mind. ^___^

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 8th, 2010 10:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think most people just park one car in there, and use the back end for storage, or sometimes extra living space.  If there's a second car, it's probably outside.

There's also such a thing as a one-and-a-half car garage.  Still wouldn't be able to park two cars in there, but it'd be handy for one car and auto maintenance.  I think either way, Heero would have had to move his car, unless he drives a mini or something, because if Duo wants to be in there next to him with enough room to work on all sides, it'd be a little tight.  Unless one of them has a motorcycle, I guess.  But I don't think Heero would consider the motorcycle practical for his daily car, and... I dunno, do you have to rotate the tires of a motorcycle? ^^'
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 10th, 2010 02:57 am (UTC) (Link)
Rotate motorcycle tires...? O_O I have no idea... I'm pretty sure that would involve actually removing the tire from the rim... and modern bikes usually don't mount the same size on both ends. I think. >_>

Hmm... Can't really imagine Heero owning only a bike. It's kind of limiting. O.o I can maybe see Duo having only a bike, but even then, that would be a stretch. They just aren't an all-purpose vehicle, no matter how many bikers try to say they are. ^___^

The one time I was in a long garage, it was terribly claustrophobic. My garage is a single, but even it felt bigger than the long double. O.o Maybe the proportions...

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 13th, 2010 06:00 am (UTC) (Link)
Ha, I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks the guys wouldn't immediately go out and buy a sleek and sexy bike as their sole vehicle.  Then again, I did submit to popular perception and give my Haven boys a couple of bikes... but at least they and their jeep are all like retired vehicles from some old military base that were being sold off at auction or something. o_o

I've seen people park suburbans in their one-car garages... there's just enough left-right clearance for them to get in the door.  Not sure how much room they actually have to open the door once they get in.  But I think the garages are large enough that you can park your trashcans against the wall without blocking your way in.  Just wouldn't be able to walk past them, I guess.
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 15th, 2010 02:45 am (UTC) (Link)
I could maybe see something fancy as a toy, but for practical guys? Not really. *shrugs* Street-legal dirt bikes I can see, as emergency vehicles for when you need to make your own road, but a tricked-out Harley? Not so much. That's mostly just a dick-extender anyway, and I seriously doubt any Gundam pilot needs one of those. ^____^

One of my neighbors manages to stuff a Denali into their garage, but I am convinced the driver enters and leaves by way of the sunroof. >_>

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 15th, 2010 07:11 am (UTC) (Link)
Yes!  I've never quite seen the appeal of owning a sexy expensive sports car when you've piloted a Gundam.  How does it even begin to compare?  (someone should also lecture those boys on fiscal responsibility... =p)
lavendarlizard From: lavendarlizard Date: December 17th, 2010 09:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
*snicker* What kind of thrill do you get from traffic after you've nuked a division of mobile dolls? ^___^ Not much.

sunhawk16 From: sunhawk16 Date: December 7th, 2010 12:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
The cake is a lie? There is no cake? Wait...
This is adorable, if you don't mind the use of the 'A' word. :D You really do this sort of realistic get-together perfectly.
turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 8th, 2010 10:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heero would not lie to his Duo about there being cake.  Cake is a serious matter.

It's funny that when I first came up with the idea to use the pseudo-prompt as 'I would never ask you out' or something like that, I naturally and immediately started building a fic out of Duo saying that in a foot-in-mouth moment.  But then I remembered all my past resolutions, and it's technically your prompt so you should get what you want, so I had to rethink everything to come up with a way for Heero to be the one to have that foot-in-mouth moment for once.  ... That was kind of hard for me! ^^
sunhawk16 From: sunhawk16 Date: December 11th, 2010 03:50 pm (UTC) (Link)
Wait... this is MY prompt? This would be where I dig my toe in the dirt and try to dredge up what I actually said... right? >_>
turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 13th, 2010 06:38 am (UTC) (Link)
sunhawk16 From: sunhawk16 Date: December 18th, 2010 02:13 am (UTC) (Link)
We'll I'll be damned... :D
kitsuneyasashii From: kitsuneyasashii Date: December 8th, 2010 07:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Loved it. Loved loved loved it. Sweet and perfect. [like cake! <3]

I don't know if it's what you were going for, but as I read something, I always think about what the title represents, and this made me think of the phrase 'having your cake and eating it too', cause that seems to be the dilema the boys are faced with. Neither is willing to risk what they have for something they may not get, but in the end they both get cake! [And I'm sure they can come up with creative ways to eat it. tehehe] Wonderful work.

turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 8th, 2010 10:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
'Having your cake and eating it, too' sort of crossed my mind as well, except I was too lazy to think any harder about it than that. ^o^ I suppose the boys also had to break a few eggs to make their omelette (or cake)? ^^

In retrospect, it occurs to me that the fic is rather colloquial.  I'm sure terms like 'cake' or even 'BFF' probably don't internationalize very well. ^^
miyun From: miyun Date: December 12th, 2010 09:48 am (UTC) (Link)
*snickering* I'm laughing at them. I love those, "it's right in front of you! open your eyes!" moments. *swoons* somuchlove!
turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: December 13th, 2010 06:45 am (UTC) (Link)
I think Heero's crushes just take on weird forms, while Duo's crushes... seem to be equipped with hyperjammer stealth/cloaking systems. -_-
miyun From: miyun Date: December 13th, 2010 06:49 am (UTC) (Link)
Hehehe. Well, I'm glad they somehow manage to get together in the end. 8D
hostilecrayon From: hostilecrayon Date: November 12th, 2011 09:50 am (UTC) (Link)
Somehow you always manage to push all my ZOMG CUTE buttons all at once. <3
turnippatch From: turnippatch Date: November 13th, 2011 07:52 am (UTC) (Link)
25 comments or Leave a comment